Fool’s Gold

Self Deprecation

Self Deprecation (Photo credit: mikecogh)

Insecurity is a fraud. He masquerades as bravado, or the victim, or as self-deprecating. His faces manipulate others to validate him. “Tell me I’m who I want to be.”

Mark wishes to be admirable. Financial success will make him so. He keeps others abreast of his progress, showcasing himself, and waiting for affirmation. It’s never enough.

Ann’s life is a soap opera; she would be successful except for the evil things befalling her. Encourage her 24-7; it’s never enough.

John recounts his failures. At everything. His failures are legend. He is ugly too. He basks in the warmth of your protests, but they can’t satisfy.

I alone resolve the lack, remaining insecure as long as I wish to be more, comparing myself to others, and finding me wanting. Believing I am whole, perfectly suited to be me, solves the problem.

In pursuit of security, our drug may be man’s approval, and like a shot of whiskey, it soothes the doubt; then we slide the glass back for another…


About Stephen

I love diversity, and the opportunity to learn from everyone everywhere. My life has been one long adventure, from the jungle of Indonesia to the Amazon, and a few places in between. Multilingual and cultural, I adapt and find comfort in even the roughest spots, meeting challenges with relish.
This entry was posted in Children out of Control, Humility, Parenting, Security and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to Fool’s Gold

  1. I find that often I am “John” also because in addition to my own insecurities, I somehow mistake self-deprecation for humility….

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